Rock >Me< Hard Place

Suture Self

I figured it was that time again to put out another stream of consciousness regarding me, the space in time that I’m currently occupying and perhaps touch on some plans going forward.

I last wrote about ‘easing up’ on my personal filter through online writing and getting more involved. Wading in, if you will. I received some wonderful comments and better still, some reflections from others on how they tend to wrestle with full disclosure vs. limited sharing. All that said, I hope to share a bit more than what is typical for me and..that..will…starrrrt….now.

So, I’m not working. A lot of you know this particular detail about me while some of you may not. Call it a blessing in disguise or a kick in the ass, in any event, at this particular space in time..I’ve made it work to my advantage. This development came about just as the summer was kicking into high gear. I have two kids (teenagers) that would be off for the summer and that was a factor in my thinking as to either chase down employment again or take the summer off to spend time with them instead. I eventually chose the latter.

Like all fairly big life decisions, it wasn’t that easy to come by..this ‘not actively seeking out work’ thing that I settled on. I did have a brief foray into sending out resumes for various positions. I attended some interviews, had great conversations with businesses and organizations in London and gained perspective on the whole exercise. What made the difference for me recently was that I went into my last interview at a London business with a plan in mind. It was simple..if I got the job, I was going to Love It and work the shit out of it (they’re a great company and would’ve deserved nothing less from me)…or…if I didn’t get the job, I was going to take the summer off, spend time with my kids, re-evaluate my goals and get involved with my community. It felt pretty good to have that much decided going in.

Now the rock and a hard place part…
(Maybe that’s not the best title for this post but it just came to me and I’ll explain why)

On the one hand I have two kids and I’m not working so the one surplus I have is time. This has enabled me to get out and meet with some great people here in London, share ideas, brainstorm, attend events and ultimately shape all of this into something I want to do and am very passionate about and that is to start a project, turn it into a business and give back to the community I live in.

On the other hand I have two kids and I’m not working so the one deficit I have is a lack of funding. Oh there is ‘some’ but I’m a single parent and also doing this on my own so I’ve learned to budget well over the years. But the funding isn’t so much the issue.. I mean, sure it would be nice to be on a payroll again but what really plunges me into thought is the absence of the personal work, learning, research and connecting with others I’ve been doing with the free time I’ve had versus the potential of rejoining the Monday to Friday crowd.

Either way and for now you should expect to see more of me out there as I’m milking this free time for all it’s worth. I cannot say enough wonderful things about the people I have met and those that have taken the time to listen to me ramble on about this idea and that. The friends I’ve made in this short time span have blown me away. The goofing off at festivals that I’ve done with the kids is time well spent and the ‘patio socials’ whether they’re fuelled by coffee or beer are a pleasant diversion.

So a big thanks to all for your input over the past little while, for the advice that you’ve shared, the time you’ve invested and just being around to listen (or read)
It is very much appreciated.

e.